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Archive for April, 2009

by Old Uncle Crow

Our divorced and widowed mother was an anxious parent.  “Don’t come crawling back here with your (more…)

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by Old Uncle Crow

Blow it out your ass! follows all of the same rules as the foregoing discussion of the construction up your hole!  The same distinctions apply also to the variant form:  blow it out of your ass! only excepting the necessary caveat that the latter is the intensive form. The only real distinction is that both forms are case specific in the way up yours & cet is not.  By this I am not referring to matters of grammar.  Rather, what I am telling you is that in the 1950s in rural Eagle Lake, MN, among male members of the so-called “Greatest Generation,” the phrase was used only antiphonally, and specifically in response to untimely (more…)

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by Old Uncle Crow

The correct form in rural Eagle Lake, MN, in the 1950s among male members of the so-called “Greatest Generation” was:

Up your hole!

There is none of the subjunctive about it; it is not on all fours with other declarations of wish, such as long live, or God save, the king.  The intent is imprecatory, not exhortatory, the application expletive and the mood, precisely, imperative.

On car trips into Mankato, MN, as a small boy from the Summer of 1956 onward, I heard on different occasions both my late maternal uncle (more…)

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by Judson Andersen

Now that we get word that Minnesota is in the shit and needs a whopping tax increase, word comes that in England “they” are planning to soak the top income sonsobitches 50P on the quid!  Naturally as far as a Hell of a lot of ’em are concerned, “Prime Minister” Gordon Brown The Sonofabitch is the most evil bastard on the face of the Earth….

PD*28347759

But just take a look at this, OK…the lustreless eyes, the slack lip and jowls, the half a day’s growth of whiskers…Christ Almighty, this asshole is (more…)

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by Old Uncle Crow

I am mostly an ordinary American crow (corvus vulgaris), feeding on the contents of McDonalds wrappers.  NO investment bankers and other peabrains in suits come in THESE joints…the hogs just plain can’t afford to!  But the heifer who screwed up my last order there in greasy old Mankato, MN., WAS actually kind of a dang buffalo calf woman, if not just a wild young sow herself…. 
     The price for all the fine dining was $4.25, so I handed her (more…)

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by Old Uncle Crow

NZ of Old Terre De Bleu City, MN, writes:
 
A woman went to her Terre De Bleu City Clinic doctor for advice.  She told him that her old buck husband had developed a penchant for “toobing,” and she was just not sure that it was such a good idea.  She hadn’t seen much on Tee Vee on Oprah about it and didn’t know (more…)

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